Today, I went to return the bags. She was just on her way back into her house and she had 2 friends with her. She asked if I minded if they had a look in my house & check out the spiral staircase. As they came over one of them claimed to be a fan of my cat Yoda (a black Persian)despite being dog lovers!
They came in the house and we chatted for a couple of minutes and then they left to go back to my neighbours....
My Mum came round and as we were on our way out to get some lunch we ran into my neighbours friends again...
"Have you a Rose in the family" one of them asked me..
Mum & I were quite taken aback and said that we had.
"It's just when I came into your house, I felt the name very strongly, she is with you now" He looked at my Mum and asked if it was her Mum.
My neigbour said.."OOOH, he's very psychic!!"
Now...My Mum was adopted and didn't find out (although she had her suspicions) until long after her adoptive parents (who had always denied it) had died.
One night, about 15 years ago my Mum & I were chatting about the fact she had been adopted and I asked her if she had ever thought about tracing her real mother. She said that she had thought about it but never done anything about it. I asked her what she knew about her. She told me that when she had originally found out she was adopted she had gone to St Catherine's house to get a copy of her birth certificate, the officials then told her that all records to do with her adoption had been destroyed in the war.
My Mum said the only details she had was her original birth certificate and that an old aunt had told her that she had be born in somewhere called the Mission Of Hope in Croydon. We looked again at the birth certificate and saw that her mother's name was Rosetta Camomile but the father was unknown. Intrigued I asked my Mum to think again about tracing her because I was really interested. She said that she would.
The next morning, I couldn't stop thinking about it and I wondered whether 'The Mission of Hope', then an unmarried mothers home, could now be an old people's home or residential care home.
I looked at the birth certificate and saw that The Mission of Hope was in Croydon,I took note of the street name, I took out the Yellow Pages and looked for OAP Homes in croydon, looking out for that street in particular. There were lots of residential homes so I just picked one randomly...and made a call.
A woman answered the phone...
"Hi, I was wondering if you might know where the Mission of Hope is in Croydon?" (This was the days before the Internet & google!!!)
The woman at the end of the phone said to me.."You're not gonna believe this about about 20 years ago, I used to work opposite there, however it's not called the Mission of Hope anymore, it's now called Birdhurst Lodge".
I then rang directory enquiries and found the number. I rang them asking if they had records dating from 1942 (the date my mother was born)..."Yes" they said, "Get your Mum to ring us and we can forward all the details to her".
Wow...what a coincidence. Of all the women to answer my call, I should get someone who knew where it was!! Hurrah :)
The Mission of Hope, Birdhurst Lodge, Croydon.
We received a few more details about Rosetta, there was 2 letters she had written saying how thrilled she was that her daughter had been adopted by such a nice family, that she was surprised that it had happened so quickly and that she would be delighted to receive photos. There was also a couple of forms that she had filled in on entering the home with her age, address and am agreement to do light housework while she was there.
On the form the baby (my mum) was referred to as 'it'. Does your Mother know about 'it'... Yes.... Does your father know....No...Will the father of the child be involved?....No
There wasn't much else.
Armed with the little information we had we set out to find out more about her.
We knew how old she was from the forms but had no DOB. There was something inside my head that kept telling me she was a Gemini (I am a Gemini)I couldn't explain why I thought that.
My Mum set off to find more details and went to check the records so that we could find her DOB, see if she had married and check to see if she had any other children.
When we finally found her DOB we were shocked to see that Rosetta and I shared the same birthday. I immediately understood why I felt such a connection to a woman I had never met.
Unfortunately she had died some years ago so meeting her wasn't an option. The records we found revealed that she had married about a year after my Mum was born but that she hadn't had any more children.
The only connection we had left to explore was when we found a copy of her will we saw that her money had gone to her husband and when he died he had left the estate to his brother who was married to a lady called Jennifer.
Jennifer was old and unwell, and it was clear that she hadn't known my Grandmother very well. "Rose and Sydney kept themselves to themselves" Despite hearing that she had be known as Rose, we have always referred to her as Rosetta.
I found out a few more details about her family but pretty much came to a dead end as far as Rosetta was concerned.
She has never been too far from my mind though, and I thought about her alot as I was thinking about having a child with a anonymous sperm donor. I worried that this was History repeating itself, but that I was going into a situation my grandmother had no choice about, but going into it consciously.
At first My Mum struggled with the idea if me having a sperm donor baby, I think it felt a little close to home. This was until I explained that the situation would be very different. I will never lie to my child, I will bring them up to know the truth, and will actively assist them to find out more about their father if this is what they want to do. I won't be taking secrets to the grave like the previous generations of my family.
Which brings me back to what happened today...Yes, we do have a Rose in the family, and I am delighted to know that she is close to me and has a strong presence in my house, especially with what I am going through now with the IVF.
My neighbours friend then said that he had some other things to tell us but would save it for another day. When I asked him what it was, he said "It's about you".
I asked him if I should be worried, he said "No, exactly the opposite, something very good,nothing to worry about at all, you have very good karma in your house".
Arggghhh...what was it he had to tell me?
I'll take it as a good omen, my grandmother is close and good things are coming my way...
Wow that's amazing xxxx
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